DJ NYT brings the bling, and spins one for the ladies in the house tonight!

Upon reviewing Nicholas Kristof’s latest article and blog post; they collectively form the play list for DJ NYT’s Patronizing the Palestinians 2010: Summer Party Mix.  First up is his latest article, "Waiting for Gandhi on the West Bank".

Despite being stoned and tear-gassed on this trip, I find a reed of hope here.

While much of the world have been meanies and given up on the Palestinian-Israeli Peace Process, this brave Western soul hasn’t!  DJ NYT starts the show with Great White Hope Still Has Hope for "Peace" This one is also a fave of Thomas Friedman and Roger Cohen. The benevolent Great White Hope is writing to teach you a lesson on the two state solution!

Fire up the bbq and get a cold one out of the fridge cuz here comes that classic summer jam: Protests Aren’t Peaceful.


At first the mood was festive and peaceful, and you could glimpse the potential of this approach. But then a group of Palestinian youths began to throw rocks at Israeli troops. That’s the biggest challenge: many Palestinians define “nonviolence” to include stone-throwing.

I love that one because it brings back fond memories of MC Jaron’s blinged-out party anthem from earlier this year: West Bank Spectacle.

Here’s track 3 on DJ NYT’s summer play list. This one comes from the New York Times’ Greatest Hits album. We all fondly remember the classic, No Palestinian Ghandi:

It’s a far cry from the heroism of Gandhi’s followers, who refused even to raise their arms to ward off blows as they were clubbed.

DJ NYT surprises the crowd by playing the lead single off Kristof’s new album. Here‘s one for all the ladies in the house tonight: Unless Palestinian Women Get Beaten, Protests Aren’t Peaceful

What if the women allowed themselves to be tear-gassed, beaten and arrested without a single rock being thrown?

MC Kristof has always been known for the deep social commentary in his lyrics.  He doesn’t disappoint today!

Coming up next is a new take on an old favorite, The Good Palestinians (PA Luv) Seek Peace:

One genuinely peaceful initiative is a local boycott of goods produced by Jewish settlements on the West Bank.

Finish off that strawberry daiquiri, because here’s one I know you’ve all been waiting for: No Palestinian Martin Luther King!

So far there is no Palestinian version of Martin Luther King Jr.

Get ready to hit the dance floor, cuz comin atcha here’s Palestinians Aren’t Feminists

Most Palestinian demonstrations are overwhelmingly male, but in Budrus women played a central role.

It’s good of MC Kristof to teach Palestinians how to properly protest.  Is there anything this magnanimous outsider can’t do!? 

DJ NYT took a quick break, but the hits keep coming this Summer 2010! Kristof’s blog post “Palestinian Civil Disobedience”: Palestinians Aren’t a Partner for Peace:

the Palestinians are split between Gaza and the West Bank, so there is no unified entity that can deliver all Palestinians.

The ladies always throw their panties on stage for this next one, We All Know What Peace Would Look Like:

we know what the final deal would look like — the Clinton parameters, or the Geneva accord.

For the first time ever, First Intifada Not Nonviolent back to back with that smooth slow jam, Palestinians Would’ve Disgusted Ghandhi (ft. Kenny G on the Sax):

Compare the first intifada to Gandhi’s salt march or to King’s work in Selma, and they’re not remotely similar…His principle was that protesters shouldn’t even raise their arms to protect themselves when they were clubbed — and stone-throwing would have left him aghast.

DJ NYT closes the set with two show stoppers, Israel: Still a Democracy / Palestinians Must Prove their Peacefulness To Earn Their Freedom:

But Israel is a democracy with huge numbers of television cameras all over. And I think American public opinion and a good chunk of Israeli public opinion would be moved by the sight of large numbers of peaceful protesters.

I’m disappointed DJ NYT didn’t play the bugged out Busta Rhymes inspired Fayyad Fetish (only the remix w/ Lady Gaga on the hook).  I was also surprised he left out my favorite song of all time Right of Return not Realistic (Baby, Look Forward not Back).

Posted in Beyondoweiss, Israel/Palestine

{ 15 comments... read them below or add one }

  1. David Samel says:

    Joseph, I am a somewhat ambivalent about your article. On the one hand, it is quite witty, and even more importantly, I agree with all of your criticisms of Kristof. On the other hand, it seems to me that Kristof is venturing out on a limb where few if any mainstream media pundits have dared or wished to go. He is actually presenting a picture of Palestinian suffering that we rarely see. He may be pompous and patronizing, and fully deserving of your sarcasm, but I see his recent columns as a hopeful sign of movement in the right direction. The comments section shows howls of genuine, sincere outrage directed at him by the pro-Israel crowd, and I would be cautious about helping these people saw off Kristof’s limb. He’s testing the waters, probably of his own mind as well as NYT tolerance, and should be encouraged to wade in a little farther. That being said, I do appreciate the dissection, and if by chance he sees it, I would hope he finds it enlightening.

    • Chu says:

      When I first read his article, I thought to myself ‘it’s about time, Kristoff’. But now that he’s put himself out there, he seems to be backtracking in a major way. I am sure his criticism against Israel has been tough, but he should stand by his guns.

    • sherbrsi says:

      He is actually presenting a picture of Palestinian suffering that we rarely see.

      Before immediately going ont on to frame it in the manner entirely consistent with the American/Israel narrative: violent Palestinians posing as non-violent protesters. And in no subtle manner either, painting with the broadest brush possible.

      If this is the best dissent that the NYT has to offer, it is better that it remains the Zionist mouthpiece it is.

      • David Samel says:

        chu and sherbrsi – I just read Kristof’s column again and have to say it was worse than I remembered. I knew it was patronizing and placing the burden on the oppressed rather than the oppressor, but it had fewer if any redeeming qualities than I thought.

  2. Kristoff’s article was far more relevant and effective at changing hearts and minds, knowledge, interpersonal and politically institutionalized relations.

    You should be ashamed to clown this Glatzer. You have strong feelings and an intelligent mind, but are not putting the two together.

    What have you seen? What have you heard? Share it already, and only that.

    • Citizen says:

      Hey, Witty, you forgot Justin Bieber’s new hit: Even Buber Told Gandhi No Violence Don’t Cut It In The Promised Land.

  3. Judy says:

    Totally hilarious and sadly, very true.

    The best thing about Kristoff’s trip? This from his facebook page:

    link to facebook.com

    “Somebody asked my 16-yr-old son what he had enjoyed most about Israel so far. Old City of Jerusalem? Dead Sea? Masada? No, he said, the best part had been being tear gassed with me while covering a demonstration in the West Bank town of Bil’in on Friday. I guess a family that is tear gassed together stays together.”

    Perhaps there will be hope in the next generation!

  4. Chu says:

    hysterical, glatzer. who ever through a dj could make you cry in this way! Where’s Gandhi, is a house vinyl classic; a true dj collector’s item.

    Kristoff wings managed to glisten and shine in the sun for mere seconds, but his wings melted and he fell down hard to earth.

  5. RE: “the play list for DJ NYT’s Patronizing the Palestinians 2010: Summer Party Mix” – Joseph Glatzner
    MY COMMENT: Let’s party like it’s 1959!

  6. Cliff says:

    Great post. Sick of hearing yuppies lecturing the Palestinians about nonviolence.

  7. MHughes976 says:

    Maybe we could change mood, borrow some Rossini tunes and have an opera called ‘William Tell in Palestine? Are there no apples in the Middle East?’ Or if we wanted to make Palestinian rights even more absurdly dependent on borrowing characters from different cultures and situations we could have a Chinese-style drama called ‘Where is the Palestinian Ming Dynasty?’