I’d love to see a satirical play that begins with one Presidential candidate–trying to best all others in proving his love for Israel–who says he/she will ensure Israel’s eternal security by making it the 51st state. Before Israel and AIPAC can mobilize to strangle the idea in infancy, it takes on a life of its own. Legislation is introduced, Congressmen rush to pledge their states to ratification, and Governors pile onto the bandwagon. Meanwhile, behind the scenes, Likud figures and Neo-cons are frantic, squawking among themselves about all kinds of dire consequences such as civil rights laws, paying U.S. taxes with no certainty of breaking even, let alone showing a $3-billion annual profit, and—most of all—the impossibility of maintaining its “state laws” of ethnic privilege with the U.S. Constitution looming large overhead. “How can we plead victimhood when we’re part of a Superpower?” asks one. “Will the Pentagon mow the grass for us?” moans another. But the train rolls on with both parties, Christian Zionists, and the media pitching in.