My wife and have 2 dogs, no kids. Our female dog got her right rear leg amputated on Tuesday.
She’s 9 years old. She’s been active for years. One reason I’m crazy about her is that I went into the woods with her almost every day, and every winter I took her to the Adirondacks. She’s smart and capable in the woods.
A few months back she got a lameness. We tried to deny it for a while. The lameness came and went, she’d hold up her back foot. The vet said it was a growth on her toes. But it only got worse. The lump got bigger. We took her to my sister, a vet, and two other vets. I first heard the word amputation in April and denied it. I kept taking her for walks, but she lagged. She’d use three legs, only use the fourth when she really needed it. At night she’d bother the lump endlessly, trying to heal it with her tongue. The last vet came highly recommended, and he said, Your dog’s in a lot of pain, she doesn’t want to show it. You should take off the leg.
It upset me when I went to pick her up. They didn’t want to bring her out in the main waiting room. Didn’t want other people to see it. The tech was one I’d never met before. She was official with me then brought my dog out a side door into the sun. She was using a towel as a sling to hold up her back end. I kissed my dog but she was in a daze. I put her in the car and she just looked off. When I got her home I saw the cut and stitched part.It’s like meat, or a package of flesh you’ve never seen on a body. I couldn’t do anything that day. I put the dog on a pillow with our best sheet on it. I kept thinking about whether my dog will have any kind of life after this, whether she will still go hiking. Everyone has said to me, We see a lot of dogs running around on 3 legs. But I’d say the same thing to them, wouldn’t I? The business at the vet’s made me ashamed, and my other dog, her brother, seemed depressed. I made her go outside to relieve herself and she walked around a little and it weirded me out to see her defecate without a leg, strange, ugly. Then my dog went into the guest room she’s taken over, crawled under the bed. She had been there constantly over the last few weeks thru the pain, she’d made it her den. That afternoon it seemed she was angry at me. She knows she’s been dismembered, she thinks I’m the author of that.
My wife called soon after I got home and I nonchalanted it but she could tell I was freaked out. I got her from the train that night. When she got home she got down on the floor next to the bed and kept talking to our dog. Finally I brought her out to give her her next pill and my wife was shocked by the maimed meat part. She moved past it more quickly than I did. My wife is closer to the ground, to reality. She accepts what’s happened, I can’t. She says the dog’s gotten better somewhat already and we’re going to let her figure out what she wants to do from now on. “I just want my dog back,” I had said to the vet when we made the date for the amputation. I fear I’ll never have her back, in that old way. My wife is more accepting. Still, she’s afraid to touch the wound. She hasn’t picked her up. In that way, it’s a little like the Metamorphosis, the way the family is flipped out by Gregor Samsa’s change. A friend came by and cooed to the dog under the bed for a while, then said Everything’s going to be fine, and I couldn’t say anything at all. She said, You should take a picture. My wife said, Isn’t that gruesome?
I know, it’s just a dog, and it’s just been 3 days. Who knows, a few months from now. Still, the experience has opened my heart to the families of people maimed in Iraq. On the TV there are always inspirational stories about these people, getting better with prosthetic limbs and small-town parades and throwing out the first ball (Johnny Damon’s friend who lost an arm), the American ones anway. I’m sure that stuff is all true, I hope it’s true. Right now I see the grief, the loss, the shock, the shame, and the long shadow over the future.
Related posts:
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- A Response to a Reader’s Complaint That I Have Too Many Out-of-Focus Pictures of My Dogs
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{ 27 comments }
Dogs and dog tags…
So sad.
Keep us posted on how your dog is doing, Phil.
When's the last time Bush visited a vet hospital?
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Phil, a vet I know has a dog like that. She devised a harness for the back right leg that ended in a 4-in. wheel instead of a leg-looking thing. He learned to play ball at age eight in that harness. Runs around the house on three legs, but literally puts himself into that harness when he want to play ball, then barks. Backs into it. He uses his back left leg like a rudder and propellant. He loved, LOVED, to go swimming in shallow water after the amputation. The vet said that's how she got him to understand how to use the prosthetic she designed.
Still.
I am a dog-lover and owner too, and I'm having a hard time writing this.
Thank you for mentioning the maimed soldiers. I have no way of even comprehending the finality, frustration, and all-encompassing loss the wounds and limbs represent other than to know that they were preventable, and as a citizenry, we failed these soldiers in our basic duty to them: to verify the policy is accurate and necessary.
As Joe Scarborough — surprisingly — said the other morning, and I paraphrase, we all fell in line behind a President who asked him to be loyal to him, who values loyalty deeply. But it was loyalty to him personally. Not loyalty to the country.
And that will be part of our shame when we see what we have done.
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i have a 6-month old puppy right now that i'm deeply attached to. he's supposed to get fixed here soon and that is killing me. maybe it's just a reflection on me as a guy, but i think what right do i have to change his life so he'll be able to fit in better with mine (ie go to doggie day care, boarding etc where they demand spay/neuter). very rough. i like him complete and himself. your dog not only misses her completeness and old life, she misses the old you. they can tell you're embarassed. like our wounded soldiers you pass on the street. if you live anywhere that these soldiers come from.
Dear Phil,
My father had a dog whose leg was injured and thus had to live with being a "three-legged dog. She survived happily a number of years and remained active, playful and involved on our Iowa farm. She remained an outdoor dog and continued to thrive even through our cold harsh winters Give your dog time and yourself time to heal. I trust you will still hike the Adirondacks together.
I read your blog faithfully and appreciate your hard look at the occupation and America's involvement in continuing it. I would like to alert you to a conference being held in Olympia, Wa this October on the dual occupations: Iraq and Palestine. More info is available at the Rachel Corrie Foundation website.
Again, thanks.
Time, Mr. Weiss, give it time. Perhaps its only virtue, but what would we do without it other than live forever with unwashable sadnesses? You, and she, will see.
Cheers,
Phil– This is mighty coincidental, but I've seen two, happy and healthy, three-legged dogs out for walks just this week. One dog had one of its front legs gone and the other was missing one of its back legs. In both cases the legs were fully amputated to the torsos. It was obvious the dogs weren't as fast as they had once been with all four legs, and walking appeared to be more of an effort for them. But they sure seemed happy to be out with their masters and happy to be alive.
So show her plenty of love and treat her normally. She'll likely recover quicker than you will. Surviving and even thriving under adverse circumstances are a dog's lesson to mankind.
Phil,
Your account of that first day with your dog after the amputation is very moving. I remember your mentioning it to me during one of our phone conversations (again in a nonchalant way), however, the pain in your voice was obvious.
Your current ordeal reminds me of a famous story we learned in school (probably true) about a simple bedouin poet who was invited to the court of the Abbasid Caliph Haroon Al-Rashid to compose a poem in praise of the "great" man. The bedouin, using imagery from the desert that he knew, spoke of the wisdom and bravery of the great Caliph and closed his poem by describing him "as honest and loyal as a dog". Whereupon, the Caliph's courtiers and guards, thinking that their master had been insulted, jumped on the poor man intending to beat him or worse. However, the Caliph was not dubbed Al-Rashid (the wise) for nothing. He ordered his men to release the man and reward him handsomely, explaining to his urbane court that for this simple man from the desert, who depended on his dog to protect his home and flock when he was away, comparing a man's honesty and loyalty to a dog's was the highest praise.
By the way, Haroon is the Arabic version of the Hebrew name Aaron (the brother of Moses).
in iraq and palestine, there are many young kids and adults who have experienced an amputation or four thanks to israel and its western agents – mostly jews.
the americans suffering such went to iraq to destroy and kill. who here mourns/feels the pain of a bundy or berkowitz or dahmer?
which jew, lipstadt?, goldhagen?, ??, feels the pain of the ordinary german citizen circa 30's, 40's, 50's – 2008.
like the two who died, scarborough is a liar/deceiver. that is how he stays on tv.
Dear Phil,The title worried me.Maybe you've been told to cool it, I thought. Maybe Phil won't be allowed to say what he is thinking…My condolences for you and your wife and of course your pet.But being Mondoweiss, there must be a metaphor in this.Remember Shatilla and the emotions the dead horses portrayed.And the amputated vets and Arabs…Be strong – we need you.
Shlomo and Morris, I have to hand to you guys. I read this and having had a dog has a kid was actually kind of touched. I didn't really relate this to the Zionazi jackboot crushing the Arabs and using their intestines to grease the treads of their tanks. I really didn't. But you too have enlightened me. It's all about the Jews, everything, all the time. Always has been I guess.
About the Jews, SOG? Or about the Zionists? There's a big difference, but I understand why it's so simple, convenient and useful for you to pretend there's not.
Explain the link between his dog, the jewish cabal that runs the world. And Israel. I just don't see it, please enlighten me.
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scorpio | July 18, 2008 at 02:21 PM,
I neutered my male dog at eight weeks because the breeder insisted, and I couldn't take the dog without signing papers that I would perform it within two weeks of taking possession.
I asked the breeder why I couldn't wait until six months, say, and she said recent research shows the sooner the better, and they stay in good health longer.
My breeder was the first to use DNA testing in the creation of her championship litters on the east coast over 30 years ago, and she is the type who will show up on your doorstep and take your dog away if she hears a whisper that you've mistreated it, left it in a crate too long, or failed to properly socialize the dog. She treats your ownership like a Microsoft license: something she can rescind.
Maybe she was right about the neutering. My dog runs around like a puppy at 12 years old, and luckily, has never been ill with anything. His disposition is sweet, and since he grew up being loved to death and knowing it, he even has a sense of humor.
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Slomo, Morris, contrarian, I have to agree with our dear Bill Pearlman here. But I won't find the right words for Phil, since I have no advise and am not good at condolences.
Too bad none of the orphans and street kids I pass every day can roll over, go fetch, or wag their tails. In between starving and huffing glue, they can hardly even beg.
The li'l runts could sure use some American-style super-sizin' and ride-pimpin', too. They'd prolly go bonkers for some processed meatfat in a convenient 12.5 oz. can, or a nice sweater, or some designer toys.
SOG: "Explain the link between his dog, the jewish cabal that runs the world. And Israel."
They're all animals?
MRW: thanks. i'm sure it's going to be alright. this guy's a comedian already. i just hope he doesnt lose his sense of humor when i explain what's about to happen to him. best of luck out there to all dog-lovers and world citizens.
That's what I like about you Ed. You don't engage in verbal gymnastics about how it's not Jews you hate just, Israel, the IDF, the occupation, whatever. Your just an out and out piece of shit anti-semite. And that's kind of refreshing. Although not really that different than the rest of the Phil Weiss fan base. ( BTW, what do you think of your boy Samir Kuntar, just a happy go lucky lad isn't he?
"I know, it's just a dog, and it's just been 3 days. Who knows, a few months from now. Still, the experience has opened my heart to the families of people maimed in Iraq."
Who's to blame?
Please consider Karen Kwiatkowski's thoughts–easily available by google.
Stay strong Phil. Your puppy has been there for you and she needs you now.
"Explain the link between his dog, the jewish cabal that runs the world. And Israel. I just don't see it, please enlighten me."
I think Phil's dog was sent to bring peace to the nations, and a Zionist vet cut his leg off as a warning to back off. Do I win a prize?
Phil,
I have a 15 year old Chow/Staffie mix that is starting to lose to arthritis, so I know how you feel. Her pain medication was starting to cause liver and kidney damage, so she is now off medication. So far, she seems to be happier, since he isn't in a medicated fog all of the time. But I don't know how the colder months will go.
It kills me to see her limp and lick he joints all night, since she was such a dynamo when she was young. But she has gotten used to her condition, and is still a great companion, as I'm sure your dog will be the case with your dog.
My sister's dog is missing a hind-leg, and is doing fine, even with arthritis. It just takes time for the dog and owner to heal and adjust.
"Explain the link between his dog, the jewish cabal that runs the world. And Israel. I just don't see it, please enlighten me."
Like most of sog's communication it doesn't make sense, unless one is trained in super-secret kabalistic riddle encoding which first must be stated in the right way and then solved:
"Please don't explain, just see his jewish dog run it, the link between m.e. and the world that enlighten the Israel-I cabal."
Voilá! It's a Sogstradamus-like riddle. "His jewish dog" is the american media ("Him" is the judaic egregore known as g-d), "m.e." is the Middle-East and the meaning is: (to Phil) stay quiet while g-d's wolves in the american media show the world a vision of the the middle east through israeli eyes.
And now evil dastardly sog, give me…
…Medal!,…Medal!,…Medal!
I'm glad to see SOG caught Phil's insight, his imaginative leap from the plight of his dog to the plight of the 1% of fighting Americans with dog-tags & their families back home.
Rabbi SOG…Rabbi SOG…Over here! I’d like to amend my answer with a questions of my own:
Why does a dog lick it’s own ass?… Because it can.
Why does an IDF sniper shoot a Palestinian child?…
PS
Please copy and paste the link to the only REAL rabbi I've ever encountered, Brother Nathanael Kapner:
http://www.realjewnews.com/?p=238
I'm really sorry to hear about your news, it must be tough seeing your kid in pain. However, remember our furry friends take their emotional cues from us, so she needs you to be upbeat.
Physiotherapy when the time is right will give her tremendous confidence… When healed both swimming and even going on a doggie water treadmill will help build up her strength. Also here's some links to some devices to make her life easier in the interim, until she can find her footing.
http://www.mzjf.com/links.htm#MECHANICAL
Also, giving her Glycoflex III [with perna mussels] and omega 3's [salmon oil, even sardines] to combat signs of arthritis might help. I'm also giving my dog a combo raw diet with kibble [nature variety's lamb and rice patties] — his energy and coat/health has greatly improved. Initial digestive issues were taken care by giving him some Intestinal Repair Complex powder.
I hope your kid adjusts quickly… but really they just want to know YOU are ok.
Good Luck!
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