I came down to breakfast at my parents' house yesterday and my wife said, "Have you seen my Ipad?" "Have you looked in the car?" "All through it." "What about your bag?" She rolled her eyes.
I went out to the car and searched it top to bottom, under the seats, etc. I was a little frantic. Not again. Four months ago my wife fell asleep on the train and someone snatched her Ipad out of her bag. We bought her another one.
On Saturday there was a funeral in my wife's family in Philadelphia and we'd driven around from one event to another with the Ipad in the front seat. I'd locked up, at the church, and at the club for the reception, then later at the mourning family's house-- but the windows were down a little because the dogs were in the back. Then my wife had opened the doors to get the dogs out...
My Toshiba laptop had been in the car the whole time, too, but of course no one had snagged that.
I found my wife in the living room. I said, "Find out where the Apple store is, let's go out and buy you a new one right now." She shook her head solemnly. "No. I'm not doing that. I'm not getting another one. I don't want to have the groovy trendy object that everybody wants any more." "But you love it and use it." "I don't want to have to worry about it all the time. It interferes with my human relationships. It's like when I used to go to parties in New York and a woman would be running back to the bedroom every hour to make sure no one had run off with her Prada coat. That's really stupid. You don't live life the way you want to."
I searched the car again and when I came back in my wife was in the kitchen with my mother, and my mother was pressing money on her. "Get back on the horse," she said. "Here's $60 to your new Ipad." "No," my wife said. "I mean I'll take the money, but I'm not buying another one of those stupid things."
I reheated some coffee. The Ipad was sitting by the microwave. I'd either brought it into the house the night before, boozily, and forgotten about it; or my dad, who's dottier than I am, had borrowed it and then brought it back downstairs. I brought it into my wife. She pressed the money back on my mother, and she's been using her Ipad ever since.
I sympathize with every view here. I am A Trog-Luddite (or something) — no devices whose names start with “e” or “i”, no microwave, no TV. BUT turning on a desktop [OK, OK, but I used to be employed as a programmer] every time I need a telephone number or address is a major drag. Of course, I could print the list, and have done it, and have lost the lists, and they are alway out-of-date. Gee, an i-whatever would really be handy * * *.
What is an Ipod?? I mean ,I think I know.
Is this something that you stick in your ears while you jog ??
In a parallel universe, you didn’t reheat the coffee, and forever lasted a little bit longer.
“I don’t want to have the groovy trendy object that everybody wants any more”
Maybe she gets another chance when you or your father displace it again :-)
You could have used the Toshiba to “Find my iPad.” It’s a free app on the iPad. It doesn’t say it’s by the microwave but it does identify the house.
Pssst: you have to turn it on. It will also wipe all data remotely if stolen.
RE: “You don’t live life the way you want to.” ~ Weiss
MY COMMENT: How true!
RE: “I reheated some coffee.” ~ Weiss
MY COMMENT: That’s disgusting! What kind of self-respecting American reheats coffee? That’s sooooo ‘third world’! You’re obviously a self-hating coffee drinker.
P.S. INTRODUCING MY NEW ICON/AVATAR: It was taken from this “cool” political cartoon featuring Clinton and Sarkozy – link to niqnaq.wordpress.com
I think ,he is secretly ” coffee -hating” coffee drinker. He just doesn’t know it yet.
I’m in a love/hate relationship with coffee. I strongly dislike it, but I’m very much addicted to it (3-4 cups daily). I mean, I dislike it after I drank it ,and before I have another one. Not while drinking.
this is true; i am a coffeehating coffee drinker. my wife gets the expensive stuff and i buy maxwell house, which she refuses to drink. (im cheap, too). it’s all lost on me. i dont get it. it’s just a drug, right?
So wait. You have a choice of drinking good coffee ,( that your wife buys) ,and you choose to drink a cheap one. Wow.
That’s called an ultimate sacrifice or…….whatever:).
I have no choice. I’m drinking cheap , krypto/pseudo/almost coffee ,also called “an instant” coffee. Awful. But drug is a drug. Right?
i have that choice, yes. but i reserve the rest of the good pot for the wife, and mix up some maxwell house for moi. it is called stinginess
At least Vous are a gentleman:) .
You reserve “the good pot for the wife”, while you sip a suspicious mix of both. I would alternate. One day a good one , the other day “the stingy” one. This way, I would at least look forward to the good one.
Oh, today is THE day:). I would probably cheat a little.
but the point is the good stuff is lost on me.. terrible palate
Aah, now we are talking. You should admit it from the beginning:).
Then , I recommend switching to an instant coffee.
Even cheaper, and your “terrible palate ” will not notice the difference.
“but i reserve the rest of the good pot for the wife,”
You are a good husband! I made it clear in the pre-nup my stash is not community property!
“and i buy maxwell house,”
You know, I live in one of the centers of coffee culture (Starbucks, Tullys, and I can’t think of how many other smaller roasters and packagers) and I have come to the irrevocable conclusion that even the canned coffee from the grocery store is more than acceptable if made properly and drunk fresh, and the most expensive coffee around is drek if not handled right.
And just to let you know, when I say “irrevocable”, I mean that, well, I mean… you know,…irrevocable. And about that I am adamant!
Tiny bit of advice for Philip.
Don’t say that you are “stingy”.
It stings a little when one hears it:)
Say instead that you prefer “rather simpler lifestyle” ,or, (like I sometimes say to my friends) ,”I did a vow of poverty.”
One of my friends used to say: “I’m not stingy, I’m simply economical.”
campers coffee is the best. i buy peet’s but it doesn’t compare w/good campers coffee when your out in the wilds.
I love my IPad. Perfect for note-taking and I’ve been lucky so far with security.
There is an app for the apple laptops that secretly records if the device has been stolen. There was a website that someone put up after their laptop was stolen profiling the person who stole it. I’ll have to dig that up.
if only it stayed lost. your wife was right: it’s not just the use, the application, of the technology that causes ADHD, it’s the frantic searching, the anxiety caused when the damn gadget (whatever it is) isn’t working, a mixture of guilt (am i too stupid to work this brilliant, indispensible thing?) and longing. i just shut off my facebook account (my wife had set up accounts for every member of the family) after i read about zuckerberg’s latest push for younger and younger users. i guess i’m a luddite too, so many people equating technological advances with an improved society. the worst is the gushing parents, in awe of how smart little courtney is because she can operate an ipad more easily than her parents. i got news for you, with a big enough supply of bananas and a cattle prod, i could get a chimpanzee to work an ipad. the ability to manipulate a cell phone or i-whatever is not necessarily a sign of intelligence.
could you get the monkey to write blogposts?
i’ll send the bananas
nim chimpsky
dateline: tel aviv
i’d read that.
“could you get the monkey to write blogposts?”
Thank God you are aiming higher than ungulates these days. Mondoweiss deserves the best.
i just shut off my facebook account
don’t click on the links that tell you someone wants to contact you. If the name is given, use a private email for the contact. You have to ignore these messages for about half a year to make sure your account is not reactivated, it seems.
lea, supposedly the magic number is 14 days.
Oh this is that story: link to foxnews.com
you can find your ipad or iphone with software from another ios device.
link to itunes.apple.com
If you misplace your iPhone, iPad, iPod touch, or Mac, the Find My iPhone app will let you use another iOS device to find it and protect your data. Simply install this free app on another iOS device, open it, and sign in with your Apple ID. Find My iPhone will help you locate your missing device on a map.You can then choose to display a message…
but chu my wife says you need to have an iphone to do it? she has a samsung cellphone
yeah, then you’re outta luck. It’s Apple’s way of making you by all of their devices.
I guess you can call us late adopters here at Moosehall. We refused to get a computer until somebody left one squalling in a basket at our front door. What could we do? Leave poor little Dell out there to be eaten by wolves?
mooser, im picturing it, in the front hall at moose hall, the grand staircase there– up on the wall– is that your grandfather’s head?
“mooser, im picturing it,”
Sure, sure, maybe from the street Moosehall looks like a couple of refrigerator boxes put together with duct tape, but if you look closer, you’ll see they were all side-by-sides, with icemakers. Not those cheap freezer-over models like you find in low-class neighborhoods.
“No,” my wife said. “I mean I’ll take the money, but I’m not buying another one of those stupid things.”
I think that’s the way Israelis who tell pollsters how they feel about the Occupation and “peace” like the world to think of them
“She pressed the money back on my mother, and she’s been using her Ipad ever since.”
and that is how they are. The i occ is marvellous.
I was really shocked by all of the efforts to canonize Steve Jobs for ipad, iphone, iphone….iiiiii. Ok I get the visionary the innovator but not an inventor. Created need for stuff folks did not even know they needed. A huge part of his agenda was making billions. How many jobs in the US did he create? How many of his products did he offer to those who could not cross over the digital divide.
i i i should be an indication about the focus
I pad? Please! Who on earth would steal one of those, unless it was a friend who wanted to do good by stealth. You don’t know what anxiety is, you don’t know what it’s like to own something that people would kill you to just touch, until you’ve got a Nord C-2.
Yes, I know, it’s gorgeous, and the pictures don’t do it justice. It’s way more organ than I deserve…. no, now that I think about it, maybe it’s just reparations for ending up with less organ than I deserve after my bris.
Maybe Matthew Taylor should get one.
“She rolled her eyes.”
And came up with a seven, every time? (C’mon, baby, Mama needs a new i-phone) Don’t worry, my wife has a glass eye, too. She didn’t want to tell me, but it came out in the conversation.