It’s time to rock, Joe Biden says– and breaks out the golden oldies

Israel/Palestine
on 29 Comments

Vice President Joe Biden just finished his whirlwind Israeli road show with a speech at Tel Aviv University. President Obama’s Number Two laid bare the Administration’s upcoming theme songs for the Mideast.

Biden started off with a short prelude, emphasizing the United States’ commitment to Israel’s security and then singing a favorite Israeli love song, "the United States has no better friend than Israel."

The old crooner wanted his fans to know he could keep up with the Israeli New Wave’s Delegitimacy Emo’s, introducing a new ballad "We lead the fight against the campaign to question Israel’s legitimacy," which segued into "[the U.S. stands with Israel against the] insidious campaign to challenge Israel’s right to exist."

And just to make sure everyone understood where the United States stands, between sets Biden stressed the obvious, that Israel-U.S. ties are "impervious to shifts in partisan politics."

The Vice President then shouted to the crowd it was time to rock, breaking into his biggest hit, "the U.S. is determined to prevent Iran from acquiring nuclear weapons. Period."

Turning the tempo down a notch, he proceeded with some old neo-Con favorites,

"Iranians are suffering under a leadership that supports terrorism."

"Iran has refused to cooperate."

and that oldie but goodie the

"U.S. is determined to keep up pressure on Iran to change its course."

Of course.

Having provided the crowd a steady plate of pleasers, Biden took the liberty of getting serious for a moment. In about as close as any Democratic leader is ever going to get to a Sister Souljah moment with Israel, Biden informed the gathering "that the status quo in Israel is not sustainable."

"The demographic realities make it difficult for Israel to be a Jewish homeland and a democratic country.

"To end this historic conflict, both sides must be historically bold."

It is hard to see how the Israelis could be more bold than they were this week. That message was probably directed to the Palestinians.

By the way, don’t take the Sister Souljah analogy too literally. I don’t ever remember Presidents Clinton or Obama telling African-Americans how much they are loved before scolding them for their rap music or for not turning off the kid’s video games at night.

By now the crowd was getting restless waiting for the music to return, so Biden finished up with a plug for his boss’ favorite cause,

The peace talks between Israelis and Palestinians must continue, despite Israel’s recent announcement that it plans to expand building in East Jerusalem.

"The most important thing is for these talks to go forward and go forward promptly and go forward in good faith. We can’t delay because when progress is postponed, extremists exploit our differences."

What the Vice President didn’t say is that while the Obama Administration desperately needs the negotiations to continue and continue and continue, it has no strategy for getting the talks to conclude with a deal.

At his concert in Ramallah yesterday, Biden heard backstage from the Palestinian troubadour Mahmoud Abbas that he was not even going to participate in the so-called "Proximity Talks" Concerts until Israel cancelled the plans for 1600 new housing units in East Jerusalem announced on Tuesday.

Aware that this news would be leaking out today, Biden remarked that the

Palestinians had misunderstood Israel’s announcement of the settlement plan, thinking that building would begin immediately. With no construction scheduled for now negotiators would have time to "resolve this and other outstanding issues."

See, from the Israeli side the settlement brouhaha was all a "technical matter," and from the American side it was all a misunderstanding.

If 1600 units is a misunderstanding, what are 50,000 units? Never missing an opportunity to upstage a United States road show, planners at Israel’s Interior Ministry managed to inform Ha’aretz today that "Some 50,000 new housing units in Jerusalem neighborhoods beyond the Green Line are in various stages of planning and approval."

Most of the housing units will be built in predominantly Jewish neighborhoods beyond the Green Line, while a smaller number of them will be built in Arab neighborhoods. The plans for some 20,000 of the apartments are already in advanced stages of approval and implementation, while plans for the remainder have yet to be submitted to the planning committees.

Ministry officials said that the announcement was not intended to coincide with Biden’s visit.

Sources on the tour plane, Air Force 2,  telll us that VP Joe is eager to get back home after this exhausting week. Will Obama meet him at the airport and welcome him back?

29 Responses

  1. slowereastside
    March 11, 2010, 10:23 am

    Dude, you didn’t catch the opening act?

    “Asked whether IAEA inspectors would supervise the building of an Israeli plant, [Infrastructure Minister ] Landau said: “We take care of our own needs very well and don’t need inspectors.”

    Fuck The Police

  2. Citizen
    March 11, 2010, 10:24 am

    So Biden’s in the grocery store and his brat kid acts up, grabbing stuff off the shelves and sending stuff tumbling down on passer-bys, some of whom are knocked out, sprawled in the aisle, and Nanny Beiden Hairplugs says to his brat, “Hey, come on! You really shouldn’t do that!”

    Then Beiden turns to the TV camera and says, “My mommy loved Israel and so do I. Hey, once upon a time they had signs that said “No Irish Need Apply.”

    What a mick creep.
    Beiden should rewind his watch; it’s not 1944 anymore any more than it’s 1840 USA.
    Instead, he allows you to think the Palestinians are all little Hitlers. Does he confess that in the confessional? I doubt it.

  3. potsherd
    March 11, 2010, 10:32 am

    Someone needs to openly question the fact that the US gives billions every year to Israel but still has to kiss its ass and promise total loyalty. When does Israel come over here to kiss the American ass? Where is Israeli loyalty?

    • Citizen
      March 11, 2010, 10:45 am

      It’s in Richard Witty’s pocket. He doesn’t think much of Martha Washington’s creation, but he salutes Israel’s flag. He calls that universal humanism, something beyond mere national patriotism. Why, he even thinks he’s cosmopolitan. Reminds me of just how provencial NYC is–I use to live there, in Greenwich Village and Soho.

    • Citizen
      March 11, 2010, 11:04 am

      It’s pretty simple, postsherd, just look to the Jerry Springer show. If that’s not a good
      analogy, what is? Watch the show, watch Jerry instigating, watch his ending lecture.

  4. Pamela Olson
    March 11, 2010, 10:58 am

    Well well, Mr. Biden seems to have gotten quite an education. I can just imagine him and Obama tonight, Biden drunk on Irish whiskey saying, “What the hell did you do to me, Barry? Do you have any idea what these people are like? We give ‘em $3 billion and they spit in our faces! And we just have to take it because of the damned lobby.”

    Everyone who comes up against the lobby gets a quick education. But it’s starting to make more enemies than friends, and that’s not sustainable.

    link to fasttimesinpalestine.wordpress.com

  5. Citizen
    March 11, 2010, 11:00 am

    Maybe Joe Hair Plugs, as a slight bow to the current state of the US economy, should ponder the enormous chunk of US foreign aid that goes to Israel when Israel is set to enter the ranks of the wealthiest countries in the world?

    link to jkcook.net

    Note that Israel considers the occupied Palestinian territories as part of Israel as part of its attempt to get top credit ratings.

    • Psychopathic god
      March 11, 2010, 1:00 pm

      stunning, Citizen. Thanks for the link (I guess).

      I learned recently that part of the deal that keeps Egypt “friendly” with Israel mandates that Egypt buy raw materials from Israel, with which Egypt manufactures textile goods that receive favorable status in US markets. Bill Clinton arranged the deal.

      Thus, American textile workers lose markets and jobs; American taxpayers shell out remittances to Israel and to Egypt; Egypt wins as long as it kow tows to Israel; and Israel wins again and again and again.

      In the past week or so, Israeli banks cautioned dual-citizens to take some of their money out of Israeli banks, lest they get caught in snare of new US banking regulations. This suggests that what one can easily speculate was occurring — that Jewish Americans were socking American money in Israeli banks, where GDP is less depressed than US, and where interest rates are more favorable. At the same time, Israel has access to the US Federal Reserve system’s credit window: Israeli/Israeli banks can ‘borrow’ US money at the pittance rates the Fed is now charging, use it to finance the purchase by Jewish Israeli business interests of land from the Jewish land trust (only Jews can buy land from Jewish land trust), to develop as illegal settlements. Israel: win win win. US: lose lose lose.

      Can you or I or any non-Jewish American citizen hide our money in an Israeli bank?

      • Citizen
        March 12, 2010, 1:46 pm

        No, you’re talking birth right. Only Jewish Americans get to have their cake and eat it too. So, what’s new?

  6. Sin Nombre
    March 11, 2010, 11:15 am

    Alright, what’s happened happened. Just a replay of a replay of a replay. The last was Obama saying the Pal’s were right to not negotiate while there was any settlement building going on. And then he turned tail. Now the Israelis spit in the face of these new indirect talks and indeed Biden’s to, and again, the U.S. turns tail. And almost no doubt they’ll bring the Pal’s back around to the table even despite this, and the news of the 50,000 units planned, and indeed it seems that if Israel announced plans to turn every Palestinian into a small bag of fertilizer the U.S. and Mr. Biden would be encouraging them to talk anyway, and apparently the PA would agree.

    So, aside from being mad/insulted/astonished and etc., isn’t it valid to ask just why anyone pay the least attention to this anymore? I used to ask why anyone should care since the PA is so obviously useless, but then someone said aha, because there’s real people being hurt still behind the PA. So okay, continue to care, but why continue to hope or pay any more attention to this? Care like you care for anyone else, but we don’t pay intimate attention to, say, the suffering int he Congo. Because we know it’s hopeless. Same here it more and more strikes me.

    Why in the world would the PA put even a quark of trust in the U.S. seeing what the U.S. does? Seeing Biden playing the lickspittle non pareil just now? No one in their right mind can doubt that no matter *what* Israel does in these negotiations A) it has no intention whatsoever of making any reasonable offer, and B) the US would not condemn it if the only offer it made was to make up those fertilizer bags.

    So why the hell pay any attention anymore? The PA had damn near been *invited* to just sit back, declare a state based on ’67 borders and get lots of the world’s backing. So do it, damnit. Do something. But no, it sits there, playing this game, very possibly with Abbas and friends having their Swiss accounts nicely padded for doing so by either the Mossad or the CIA or whomever. But, regardless, it’s past time to be ritually condemning Israel for this kind of crap (if for no other reason than that it can hardly be covered with any more crap than it’s already covered with), which really just glosses over the criticism and pressure that people should be putting *ON THE PA.*

    People here talk about how Israel or the jews like to play the victim; tell me that isn’t damn near 99.99% of the PA’s entire existence right now.

    Put it this way, which do you think would most advance things over there right now:

    A.) Yet another piece in a major Israeli paper or yet another even well attended protest in Israel or in the U.S. protesting these settlement plans and saying for 1 millionth time that Israel is becoming a pariah state and accusing it of not negotiating in good faith and blah blah blah, or

    B.) A piece widely circulated in the West Bank and Gaza saying that if the PA could be seen to have been already flirting with collaboration with Israel if it now just once again goes along with this it will be crossing the line into being treasonous to the interests of the Palestinians. It should therefore tell the U.S. that the absolute only way it will enter into even indirect talks now is for Israel to immediately cease work on all settlements, everywhere, period, and if the U.S. can’t get the Israelis to do so the Pal’s would publicly observe the U.S.’s inability to deliver anything to any peace talks and that the PA would thus seek other avenues to air its grievances such as declaring its statehood, period.

    I.e., who’s more deserving of criticism right now? Israel, for behaving like Israel? Or the PA, for behaving like Quislings?

    • Bruce
      March 11, 2010, 11:30 am

      As much as I tend to agree with you, I think the PA sits there and looks at what has happened to Gaza and says, that could happen to us. And no state in the world would lift a finger to challenge the US and/or Israel boycotting and demonizing us. Plus who wants to trade all those perks and telecom licenses, for a vow of chastity?

      I’m afraid only a gun to their heads would get them to pull the trigger on their Authority.

      • Sin Nombre
        March 11, 2010, 2:17 pm

        Bruce wrote:

        “I’m afraid only a gun to their heads would get hem to pull the trigger on their Authority.”

        In which case, as I said, they’re doomed and it’s hopeless.

    • Citizen
      March 12, 2010, 1:53 pm

      Actually, the US deserves the most criticism–it alone has the power to change the status quo–Obama ran on change, but it’s not to be seen. Given the US Supreme Court’s recent decision awarding corporations flesh and blood status for purposes
      of bribing congress, what’s left? Who can float real campaign finance reform and stay afloat? Nobody. We are on a trajectory towards WW3; could be in a year, could be up to a decade away. But it’s coming. Nothing else will wake up Joe & Jane Doakes. Bills will become due.

  7. VR
    March 11, 2010, 11:27 am

    Now wait a minute guys, you are falling into the same trap of responding to this delegitimizing campaign –

    “The old crooner wanted his fans to know he could keep up with the Israeli New Wave’s Delegitimacy Emo’s, introducing a new ballad “We lead the fight against the campaign to question Israel’s legitimacy…”

    Just ask the fellows who pointed this out to me under the post – “Who knew– BDS is tied to… 9/11!” They showed me the light…lol

  8. matter
    March 11, 2010, 11:41 am

    Hey Biden: Fuck you. If you really want no nukes in Iran, get rid of Israel’s nukes. Of course, as a Zionist sycophant and an overall dumbass, this idea will never occur to you.

  9. Chaos4700
    March 11, 2010, 12:21 pm

    Not to brag, but…

    I told you so.

    World War III, here we come.

    • MRW
      March 11, 2010, 12:25 pm

      Chaos, read my reply to you on the Intermarriage thread.

      • Chaos4700
        March 11, 2010, 2:22 pm

        Have done. Posted a reply. It’s good food for thought… but… I need something a bit stronger to go on.

  10. Avi
    March 11, 2010, 12:23 pm

    It need not be said, but the US is clearly not concerned about stability of any sort in the region. There is a limit to the Palestinians’ patience. They will not sit idly by and watch their land taken away bit by bit, certainly not in occupied East Jerusalem. The time will come when the frustration and anger will spill onto the streets and a third Intifadah will start.

    Israel and the US will do their usual part in blaming the Palestinians and calling for calm, but I don’t think this Intifada will be like anything we’ve ever seen. This will be a fight to the death, especially given the siege on Gaza and the death of the two-state solution.

    Other forces throughout the region will not join in unless provoked by Israel. The US will be the biggest loser should Israel attack Iran, given its troops positions in Iraq, Afghanistan and the Persian Gulf.

    The Palestinian would be wise not to start a third Intifada, but if they do, they cannot be blamed for it. At this juncture, the European Union must recognize the volatility of the situation and step in to pressure Israel.

    • Psychopathic god
      March 11, 2010, 1:10 pm

      see this item on Tikun Olam
      link to richardsilverstein.com
      Israel-Iran War Game Scenario Predicts Disaster

      (but chances are Bibi will pull the trigger)

      …The game is now approaching the critical stage, the “money time.” Netanyahu and Barak are waving the military card. “All the options are on the table,” they say, accompanying the sentence with a meaningful look. There are Israelis, in uniform and civilian clothes, who take them seriously…

      The following is perhaps the most important portion of this column since Barnea posits a startling theory to explain Bibi’s posturing and bellicosity concerning Iran. If he is right then I would feel a whole lot more confident that war is not in the offing. But if he is wrong…

      I find it difficult to believe that Netanyahu will undertake such a weighty and dangerous decision. It is more reasonable to assume that he and Barak are playing “hold me back.” On the day they will be called upon to explain why Iran attained nuclear weapons, they will say, each on his own, what do you want from me, I prepared a daring, deadly, amazing operation, but they—the US administration, the top IDF brass, the forum of three, the forum of seven, the forum of ten—tripped me up. They are to blame.

      Netanyahu and Barak know: there is no military operation more successful, more perfect, than an operation that did not take place.

      Netanyahu has upgraded Ahmadinejad to the dimensions of a Hitler. Against Hitler, one fights to the last bunker. This is what Churchill did, and Netanyahu wants so badly to be like Churchill. His credibility—a sensitive issue—is on the table. If he retreats, the voters will turn their back on him. Where will he go? In his distress, he may run forward.

      Bush was right: Obama is Chamberlain. But Bibi is not Churchill. He needs to grow a mustache.

      • Chaos4700
        March 11, 2010, 2:33 pm

        I would have to agree with you. Israel rushed headlong into atrocities in Lebanon in 2006 and Gaza in 2008, and we backed them up with all our might each time. They have no reason to assume we won’t be lead by the nose into war with Iran — especially after Biden’s ass kissing.

        People are forgetting — Israelis think they are better than those “damn, dirty Eye-rabs.” How many times have we had Zionists here, bragging about how Israel has “won every war those Eye-rabs started!” Hitler and his crew did some very momumentally stupid things, all because they believed in inherent “Aryan” German superiority. Israel doesn’t even need a Gleiwitz incident, anymore. They can just write the script, and American commentators will read from it verbatim.

        The same rubric of human hubris applies to Zionist Jews.

    • Citizen
      March 12, 2010, 1:59 pm

      Israel has recently reminded the EU indirectly that it can be smashed with IDF nukes, currently pointed in the right direction. You know those Israeli nukes the USA pretends do not exist when it threatens Iran for wanting nukes for its electrical grid? You know Iran, sidled up on its borders with US troops? Iran, threatened by Israel daily? Iran 2010 as neoNazi Germany, 1938?

  11. kapok
    March 11, 2010, 12:46 pm

    Clearly, the present “democratic” system favors the rise of sociopaths.

  12. romal
    March 11, 2010, 1:26 pm

    Hows bout some humor….

    A Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist who was badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened.

    The Marine reported, “I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road.

    I yelled to him that “Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved”.

    And he yelled back that “Barack Obama is a
    lying, good-for-nothing, left wing Commie who isn’t even an American”.

    So I said that “Osama Bin Laden dresses and acts like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian”!

    He retaliated by yelling, “Oh yeah? Well, so
    does Nancy Pelosi!”

    “And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us.”

    • Chaos4700
      March 11, 2010, 2:25 pm

      LOL! That was a welcome moment of levity. Thanks :)

  13. Chu
    March 11, 2010, 1:36 pm

    Netanyahu could have called him a coward, and he would have said thanks Bibi,
    one-two-three, “We Love Israel!”. Let’s see is Biden has any self-awareness in the coming weeks of the stain he leaves as VP coward. – If I get punched, I don’t say thanks. He could learn something from Eisenhower, as could Obama.

    This link shows the Netanyahu/Pastor Hagee love fest. Pastor Hagee, the cheeseburger with legs, is a useful idiot for the Israeli occupation. His sunday circus, has a whopping total of 19,000 members. Listen to him set the mic up for Bibi, he must’ve got that script to read a hour before. He is so full of nothing it’s incredible. He’s a new Pat Robertson, a televangelist fraud. Religious politicians should be audited and pay taxes.
    ( at 6:30 Bibi calls Pastor Hagee a great pasture.)

    link to maxblumenthal.com
    Question: How many christian Zionists are there in Christianity? 2%, 10%

    • Chaos4700
      March 11, 2010, 2:33 pm

      Not to be crass, but Biden gets paid to bend over. So.

    • Citizen
      March 12, 2010, 2:03 pm

      Bibi knows what he is talking about–Hagee cattle abound in the great goy pasture.

  14. Joseph Glatzer
    March 17, 2010, 11:18 am

    I love the sarcastic and funny tone of the article about Joe Biden “getting ready to rock”. I always make fun of the CSUN campus zionist hasbara lobbyists by saying they went into their “greatest hits”. So true. Sometimes humour is the only way to describe some of the madness!