My father just turned 83. At Thanksgiving the other night we went round the table giving thanks and he said he would wait for everyone else to say thanks before he said his. By the time we finished people had forgotten about his exemption and he mumbled something to me, and I had to get people back in the room. Then he said he was having the best year of his life. He loves his malaria work and his marriage and his family. My father is often ironical, but it felt like a sincere statement, and thrown off with the freedom the old have, that they could give a shit what anyone thinks.
My father's sense of the absurd is more developed than ever. For instance, he continues to collect ties, though he readily admits he has thousands, more than he could wear for another five or six years if he wore a new one a day. Though he doesn't always stop at one. Sometimes he sports a different tie at different hours, depending on his mood. On Thanksgiving he came out with a white one with pen-and-ink drawings of women's heads on it. Something you would expect Henry Miller to wear when he was chasing girls at Clichy. My mother was against it, on strictly aesthetic grounds. Soon it was replaced by a skinny Armani from 25 years ago he got at a church sale.
My father also bestowed on me the latest shaving system from Gillette. This is another area of interest for him–shaving–and a sacred covenant between him and his sons. I protested that I was completely satisfied by the last innovation that he had given me some time ago, the Mach 3, I think it is, which vibrates and has 3 blades. Oh no, this is far better, it has five blades, he said with his grave/ironical air, where you actually think he's serious.
"This is crazy," I said. "First it was one blade, then it was two blades, I understood that. Then it was three blades. Now it's five. Why not 30?"
"No. It wasn't five. It was four, and then it was five."
"Ok. But they are just trying to sell blades, and the damn things clog."
"These blades last 3 months," my father said. "And you really shouldn't judge it before you've tried it." He showed me how he doesn't have to reverse direction on his neck anymore, it's so good.
I'm concerned about my relationship with my father: it has held me back in life. Irony worked for him, it hasn't for me. Before I left for Thanksgiving I had a conversation with my wife's feng-shui expert about it. Catherine had come to visit. I told her that I had a notebook of my father's and that I was thinking of burning it in the woods in a ceremony that would free me of certain negative influences that my father has had on me. My wife and I once saw a homa ceremony at a monastery in India; and I was actually thinking maybe I'd go back and do a homa ceremony to deal with my father issues. The feng shui expert, Catherine, was disturbed by this. She said it was his writing, and it would be better to give the notebook back to him and say simply, "This is yours." Resorting to her earlier designation of my character, Catherine said I am a snake at the gate, and I must not get entangled in the gate, but pass thru it smoothly.
I did that at breakfast, the morning after Thanksgiving. First I had to tear out all the pages of the notebook that I'd used to make notes on. Appropriately enough they were for a piece I wrote 2-1/2 years ago for the Nation, about Walt and Mearsheimer, not a piece I'd talk about with my father. I tore them out, then I said, "This is yours," and my father took back his notebook.
I'm hoping it's useful to him with his ongoing malaria work. Myself I took the new Gillette. I haven't shaved since Thanksgiving, though I admit I'm looking forward to it.
Related posts:
- In Indiana, Obama Dreams Not of His Father
- My Father-in-Law Has a List of 30 Immediate Measures to Avert the Energy Catastrophe
- Why My Republican Father-in-Law Is for Obama on Experience
- Netanyahu’s father says Bibi doesn’t want a Palestinian state, and acted to assure that outcome
- My Father-in-Law: Failure to Solve Energy Crisis Would Be Like Losing World War II
{ 17 comments }
the snake at the gate
sounds more like Witty to me than you Phil
you give a sermon on the mount every day
witty, well he's the establishment in the realm at the time
My heavy bearded buddy and I had a shaving discussion the other day.
I am a Gillette Sensor man, no need for more than 2 blades.
He has a heavy beard and he recommends female razors. He said the blades on a female razor are farther apart than a man's razor and are less likely to clog. I'm going to give them a try.
Phil, what do you think about the NYTimes and their jihad on Gen Barry McCaffrey ties to the Military Indusrial Complex, his own business interests, and his media work?
I think McCaffrey is an easy dragon to slay. The NYT just as easily could have profiled Richard Perle. Better to attack the greedy goy war hero.
I use a four blade razor, though I've recently grown a beard.
I meant to write to you to say hello to your parents and siblings.
I didn't know he was doing "malaria work". I never really knew what your father did, or your mother for that matter.
The only sustained conversation I had with him was on what I observed on the energy deregulation legislation that was enacted in Massachusetts, and something about the prospects of wind. I think that was at my cousin's wedding five years ago.
You'll NEVER purge his influence, whatever it was. Better to embrace it, and move forward through it. In many cases, the desire to purge is a desire to ignore. I don't know if that is what you are saying.
83. My mother is 83.
Fuck Everything, We're Doing Five Blades
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33930
I thought 3 blades were silly but then I tried one and by golly they were better. Five must be even better yet again. Will have to try one.
3 blade disposable
Pacific three blades do it for me. Bic in same configuration work as well, but are more expensive. Worst is single blade disposables, no matter what kind.
My dad (died about a year ago at age 91) always used an electric razor, as does my son.
I guess I got use to simple blades in the US Army. I never had anything to shave when I was in there.
I think McCaffrey is an easy dragon to slay. The NYT just as easily could have profiled Richard Perle. Better to attack the greedy goy war hero.
Typical of the NYT. And newspapers wonder why their readership is declining. People are getting tired of this shit.
What I mean is that people are getting tired of the discrepancy, which is all to obvious.
The barbers in India are everywhere, often on the street with a makeshift setup, but also in shops, they use a cut throat razor, and when they have finished shaving you, you get an Indian Head massage, which consists of 5 minutes of having your head slapped very hard from every direction.
Mr.W and Patrick – easy on the paranoia there fellas. Don't worry, no one is planning to come for the Anglos and Mics in the middle of the night. We are reserving that for the kikes.
In India, like the Barbers, there are many ear cleaners, here are some pictures of a street market ear cleaner in action in Goa.http://morris108.wordpress.com/2008/06/07/picture-essay-ear-cleaning-in-goa-fleamarket/
…Henry Miller to wear when he was chasing girls at Clichy.
Wonderful film, wonderful music by Country Joe & the Fish. Was it? Ages ago.
I like the scene where he wakes up and instead the luscious meal of his dream finds a tiny morsel of Camenbert and a drop of wine, enjoying it as if it were what he just visualized.
I had troubles with my father too, I know one day it will be too late to get over it, but it is hard. Irony is the most perfect wall people can build up around them.
around themselves
************************************
PHIL POSTED: "This is crazy," I said. "First it was one blade, then it was two blades, I understood that. Then it was three blades. Now it's five. Why not 30?"
"No. It wasn't five. It was four, and then it was five."
ME: I JUST KNOW THAT WOODY ALLEN HAS GHOSTWRITTEN THIS STUFF!!! (WHEN HE MANAGED TO TAKE A BREAK FROM "SPEED-READING SCHOPENHAUER")
Comments on this entry are closed.