I'm reading Scoop, the folly by Evelyn Waugh about Abyssinian war reporting. Mildly entertaining. I'd forgotten that the hero works for The Daily Beast, a London newspaper. Oh right; Tina Brown didn't just make up that name for her website. The big competition in the novel comes from The Daily Brute.
Says I to myself, I will buy the domain name, thedailybrute.com, and then some day someone will want it in order to take on the Daily Beast--and they will come knocking on my door and I will make out bigtime. I looked up thedailybrute.com. Look where it goes.
WOW! Phil(l)’s the MAN! The MAN with the PLAN! Squattin’ on the domains! Domain sitter, Phil! Don’t forget about me when Rupert just absolutely has to add the dailybrute.com to his News Corp dynasty. Wait a minute! Brute…brute…brute? OMG, Phil(l) brute is so totally flamin’ gay!
Well…um…er…I suppose maybe you could say a “big brute” is kinda like a “basterd”. Yeah…yeah, Marty “Macho Man” Peretz might go for that! “Don’t f*ck with the Jews!” A real kick-ass, Jewish, take-no-prisoners, he-man site. Hooah! That niche might just work. Oh you brute, Phil!
And if you can’t interest the “Macho Man”, it will make a killer gay bondage site! Maybe we can get the franchise down at Guantanamo, rename it ‘Club Dread’, hire Xe to run it and use dailybrute.com to build up a well-heeled, global clientèle. Globalization IS the future! Pat would probably be willing to invest a bundle of his CBN profits in a growth industry like sadomasochism if we agree to front for him in return for a generous cut of the action. I think he’s really desperate to make up some of the losses he suffered on his Liberian ‘blood diamond’ mines. What kind of a putz loses money on a diamond mine when he’s best buds with a ruthless local warlord (not to mention President) like Charlie Taylor? Oh I forgot, Pat’s a Yale law grad!
We need a better mousetrap.
How do you get there?
Ditch the mousetrap.
Seal up every crack, crevice and hole. Make sure no source of water or food is available.